[:1]Pick of Destiny
by Tenacious D, starring Jack Black
10/10
one of the best movies I've seen, lots of foul language but tons of humor.|||Lady in the Water (2006)
Rating: -53/10
Fun: -3891/10
Synopsis:
A prophetic "Narf" is sent as a messenger from the "Ocean People" to the depths of the swimming pool in a Philadelphia apartment complex. Her mission: Contact a "Vessel", enlighten him with her presence, and in so doing save the future of mankind. Oh by the way, there are dogs made of grass that are bent on preventing her from accomplishing this mission, thus breaking the laws enforced by the monkeys made of sticks. Right.
Review:
If only because of Grease 2, this is the second worst movie I have ever had the misfortune of seeing. It is the cinematic equivalent of Shyamalan masturbating. At no point in the meandering, senseless plot did it even approach a moderately sane level of believability, even to drunk 9-year-old Pokemon fans. If I were ever to recommend movies to my enemies, this would certainly top the list. If it weren't for the learjet-sized eagles, and the movie critic being devoured by a grass dog, I wouldn't have even laughed. I give it a -53 out of 10, and may the fleas of a thousand camels infest nether regions of M. Night Shyamalan.|||I wrote a hateful review of Da Vinci Code but the forum monsters still lurk nearby and ate a bushel of posts from me, I may muster the effort to write it again, but then it was basically fart noises and throwing tomatoes|||Bridge to Terabithia (2007)
Rating: 8/10
Fun: 5/10
I haven't read the book, so I won't comment on the movie's fidelity. Standing alone, I thought it was great, in spite of being much different than expected. BtT oscillates between a fantasy world and real life with all its problems for two socially outcast 6th graders. I was hoping to see major development of the fantasy realm (Terabithia), and so in some sense I was disappointed by the focus on reality. However, that's only because I went to the theater expecting a Narnia-like adventure. The reality actually provides much more poignance and I have to say it got to me pretty good on an emotional level. See this movie if you want to think and feel, but not if you want an action-filled adventure.|||OMYGAWD there's a feature film with the Tenacious D label?? If it's anything like their video clips that will be gold.
*Watches **** Her Gently and Tribute for the 50th time this week*
EDIT: Ooooo new edit format... handy.
The original Clerks had one of the most memorable lines from the last decade, certainly one of the best responses to a pick-up ever. Does the sequel live up to this?|||I really shouldn't get into this thread even though it looks fun; either I'd write a one-liner or I'd get too into it and write ten pages.
Well, here's my attempt:
Logan's Run
Good movie, very glad I watched it. I thought some bits could've been improved (like at exactly what point Logan changed his mind about his mission, I found that confusing), but it's a classic all the same. Gorgeous retro sci-fi cinematography, iconic imagery, all that good stuff. I liked the leads (Michael York is a weird actor, I always like to see him in a movie), Peter Ustinov's performance was brilliant. Oh, and Farrah Fawcett(-Major)'s retro-cameo was cool, nice performance too.
I also noticed with amusement that the clean-up and brightening of the film made the model sequences look way more fake than they did in the original format (as seen in the trailers on the disc, anyway). Heh.
We've got a runner!
There, I managed it.
Quote:
Hannibal Rising 4/10
Severely lacking in plot and imagination... it's not even scary. The way he kills people are just like everyday crime.. choking, knifing, etc.
Bad movie, I would stay away even if you're a fan.
I saw posters and knew right away it would be a massive turkey, then I saw trailers and it was confirmed.
Quote:
Ghost Rider
2/10
I knew going in it was going to suck, and I was not disapointed. Some of the cheesiest, corniest lines ever, horrible acting, bad cgi, crappy fight scenes, disapointing bad guys. Pure trash.
I loved Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Bleh, to each his own I guess.
Looks so astoundingly bad I'm considering watching it.|||Quote:
I loved Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Bleh, to each his own I guess.
You aren't alone it is ranked 39th on IMDb after all.
Mind you I can't stand most of the IMDb top ten either.|||Crank (2006)
Rating: 8/10
Fun: 10/10
Hitman is injected with a poison leaving him only one hour to live. So he goes out and tries to hunt down the person who injected him with the poison.
This movie obviously has a terrible plot, so its not really a movie made to be taken seriously. Its a pure all out action movie, they spend a good 3 minutes explaining the plot before he is out with his rampage. The thing is that i saw this movie 5 times now, and its still not boring to me, its just so over the top and ridiculous that you have a great time every single time you see it. The director did some very cool effects with the movie, and it was well made. Its all just tons of action and really ridiculous scenes, if you can watch a movie that isnt serious at all, and just over the top insane, this is one of the best movies of the genre (i guess you can call it that).
And im going to watch Pan's Labyrinth tonight, to see what the hype is all about.|||I also loved Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind. I'd easily give that movie 7.5/10.
Bubba Ho-Tep
8/10
Pure comic genius starring the king of B movies, Bruce Campbell himself. This movie is about an Elvis impersonator who truly believes he is Elvis, living out the rest of his days in an old folks home. His best friend is a senile old black guy who thinks he is JFK and together they must stop an undead mummy who sucks the souls of senior citizens through their butts. Great cheesy lines and such a rediculous plot makes this movie totally awesome.|||I couldn't really get into Bubba Ho Tep, it just didn't do it for me
I liked Pan's Labyrinth, it was pretty
No comments:
Post a Comment